Reports this morning suggest the Foreign Secretary has been spotted pulling up at his office on Whitehall in an armoured vehicle, rather than his customary bicycle.
Michael Gove could be seen helping Johnson reverse park the Challenger 2 outside the Foreign Office at around 8.30 am this morning.
Witnesses confirm Johnson almost crushed Gove against a wall as he struggled to control the 62 tonnes of armoury beneath him.
The tank had been safely parked around 10 minutes before this.
Johnson has subsequently appealed for calm and told reporters he simply wanted to move his commute to ‘another level’.
He told reporters ‘There’s absolutely nothing unusual about my experiment with different modes of transport.
‘I would however suggest the general public steer clear of Whitehall and the surrounding area for the remainder of the day.
‘Unless you voted remain. Or labour. Then why not pop down for a little poke around this afternoon?
Words Tom Moore
https://www.thelondoneconomic.com/satire/95-of-brits-have-been-sent-back-to-uk-for-failing-language-test/18/01/