The assessment criteria for the vacant Health Sec job appears to have been ‘are you very keen on the privatisation of the NHS?’ Sajid Javid answered with a huge ‘hell yeh!’ and he was in Hancock’s defiled office within the hour.
He called on Batley's multi-cultural population to "just talk" to one another.
One scamp on twitter wrote: "No10 describes the claim that Boris Johnson missed coronavirus meetings to work on a biography of Shakespeare as “total nonsense” He was writing two books, one Pro and one Anti-Shakespeare."
"She was only saying what most people in Scotland are thinking," one person said.
"Waitrose Tommy" couldn't even locate Palestine on a map, one person said.
He apologised tweeting: “I’m very sorry for my earlier tweet. I was angry to see Muslim Refugees being deported on the morning of Eid al Fitr.”
A Tory win would be just the third time in 50 years a governing party has gained a seat at a by-election.
After a series of blunders that saw the country record the highest death toll in Europe, the UK government appear to finally have their ducks in line with regard to their vaccination programme.
“Comments like this undermine public trust and reinforce the idea that people were not put first during this crisis."