Joe Lycett has developed a cunning plan for the home secretary after she suggested asylum seekers were pretending to be gay to “game the system” and get “special treatment”.
Suella Braverman insisted there are “many instances” where people purport to be homosexual to receive preferential treatment in asylum applications and that the situation is not “fair” or “right”.
The Home Secretary’s comments come during her trip to Washington DC and after she delivered a speech on Tuesday questioning whether the application of the UN’s 1951 Refugee Convention is “fit for our modern age”.
She also argued discrimination for being gay or a woman should not be enough to qualify for international refugee protection, sparking a backlash from human rights activists, LGBT advocates, and prominent public figures such as singer Sir Elton John.
Sir Elton warned Ms Braverman risked “further legitimising hate and violence” against LGBT people and calling for “more compassion”.
But Lycett, a comedian, says he has developed a solution that is worthy of note.
Under his plans, all immigrants to the UK will be excluded unless they can prove they are gay – to him.
Using a newly registered company, he will develop robust ‘ass-essment’ to distinguish an applicant’s sexual preference by presenting them with a Lady Gaga CD, a fleece from M&S Blue Harbour and a naked twink called Carlos (or Steve).
If the applicant tries to have sex with any of these things, they will be determined gay and warmly welcomed into the country.
Simples!
Related: Gary Neville slams government’s so-called ‘levelling-up agenda’